Am I just a fraud or a fake?
Or has my nervous system learned to adapt?
Happy newsletter day-before you read this, why not take a moment to check in with yourself and take a deep inhale and a slow exhale out. This simple act of breathing our God given breath slowly and intentionally is regulating to your body, soul and spirit.
Now you feel regulated let me get right in there with a potentially dysregulating question (breathe your way through it if necessary!)
Have you ever felt like a fraud or a fake?
You might have noticed that different versions of you show up in different situations. There's the capable one, the one who keeps the peace, the one who hides, the one who speaks boldly, the one who just wants to be left alone….the one who (you fill in the gaps).
Rather than this being a reflection of us being an imposter, a fraud or a fake, It’s often how your nervous system has adapted to help you feel safe, connected, or in control. These versions of us are shaped by story, by what you’ve lived through, believed, absorbed, and internalised. They're ways you’ve learned to show up in the world.
In therapeutic terms, this is sometimes called parts work, ego states, or configurations of self. In faith terms, we might say they are the many layers of self that God is redeeming and integrating in Christ.
I love this verse when it comes to considering all the different versions of us that we can show the world. It is so theologically rich and therapeutically sound-everything, every single part of you finds its proper place in Christ.
So spacious is he, so roomy, that everything of God finds its proper place in him without crowding. Not only that, but all the broken and dislocated pieces of the universe - people and things, animals and atoms - get properly fixed and fit together in vibrant harmonies, all because of his death, his blood that poured down from the Cross. Colossians 1: 19-20
Your brain and body are designed to keep you safe. When you experienced stress, rejection, or shame, your nervous system adapted by helping a certain “version” of you emerge to manage it, often without conscious awareness.
The brain forms neural pathways around those adaptations. But the good news is, through reflection, compassion, and God’s truth, those pathways can be rewired. God’s kindness and grace is knitted into you at a cellular level. Neuroscience calls it neuroplasticity, scripture calls it redemption and renewal.
“Be transformed by the renewing of your mind.” – Romans 12:2
When we become more aware of the “versions” of us that lead, protect, or perform, we can begin to bring those parts into the presence of God.
Want to Go Deeper?
Paid subscribers you have access to all Journaling Prompts and Reflection Questions, you can use these in therapy, coaching, spiritual direction or simply as a self-check when you notice a strong reaction. You also have a saved space on this months webinar as well as access to my two recent e-books.
The Faith Filled Collective signs ups will close for the summer on Thursday 24th July, so if you have been considering joining us now is a great time.